Every Month is Sexual Violence Awareness Month: Reducing the Risk

Risk Factors

Drugs and Alcohol: Drugs and alcohol are the number one factor that leads to non-stranger (date/acquaintance) rape. Many victims say that their ability to react was impaired because they were drinking or taking drugs, or that their date had been drinking and became sexually aggressive.

Lawrence Greenfield did a study that found that drinking offenders committed over a third of the rapes or sexual assaults of persons older than 12.
 
Different Expectations: Acquaintance rape often occurs as a result of misunderstood sex role behaviors and/or communication styles. Don't assume that one form of sexual contact opens the door to other sexual contacts. Also, communicate your sexual expectations with your partner. If you think you are getting mixed messages, ask.

Believing No Means Yes: People who regard sex as "scoring" often believe "no" can be changed to "yes" with a little more pressure or force.

Acquaintance rape often masquerades as seduction, with the perpetrators rarely feeling they have done anything wrong. They believe that pressure is a legitimate way to get what they want.

Risk Reduction

Although sexual violence can never be prevented, here are some suggestions to help you reduce your risk of being assaulted.

• Trust your gut. If you don't feel comfortable in a situation, leave.
• Be in charge of your own life. Don't put yourself in a situation where you have to rely on other people to take care of you. Also, when on a date, don't feel you "owe" that person anything.
• Be cautious inviting someone into your home or going to someone else's home. Three out of 5 sexual assaults occur in the victim's home or the home of an acquaintance.
• Do not mix sexual decisions with drugs and alcohol. Your ability to make smart decisions is hampered when you are drunk or high.
• When going out with someone new, don't feel you have to go alone. Go on a group date or meet in a public place.
• Be aware of date rape drugs. Don't accept beverages from open containers and don't leave your drink unattended.
• Avoid falling for lines such as "If you loved me." If your partner loved you, he/she would respect your feelings and wait until you are ready.
• Avoid individuals who:
  • don't listen to you
  • ignore personal space boundaries
  • make you feel guilty or accuse you of being "uptight" for resisting sexual advances
  • express sexists attitudes and jokes
  • act jealous or possessive
• Communicate. Think about what you really want before you get into a sexual situation, and communicate clearly with your partner. If you think you are getting mixed messages, ask your date what he/she wants.
• Be assertive. Respect yourself enough not to do anything you don't want to do. Your opinions matter, and when you say "no," your date should stop.

When "No" Doesn't Work

Sometimes, saying "no" will not stop a sexual assault. Listed below are several ways you can react in a sexually violent situation. Thinking about what you would do before an assault ever happens can be your best self-defense strategy.

• Act immediately: Trust your intuition and get away if possible. Don't give in to a person's sexual demands in the hope that you can divert him/her later on.
• Stay calm. Try to think clearly about all your options. Your brain is your best weapon.
• Passive resistance. You may be able to discourage the attacker by talking. Persuade him/her not to commit the assault by making him/her see you as a friend.
• Active resistance. If you are not afraid to hurt someone, hit and kick hard-this gives you the opportunity to escape. However, fighting back may anger the attacker and cause him/her to attack more brutally. Self-defense training can make you more confident and improve your physical strength. Training is effective, but it takes continuous practice. It is not a substitute for common sense and awareness.
• Submitting. Do whatever you have to do to keep yourself safe. If you feel your life is in danger, your best option may be to submit. Submitting does not mean you consented. The assault is not your fault

(c) Copyright 2014 Robyn King. All Rights Reserved.

For more sexual violence prevention program resources in New York State, click HERE.
 

Sources: New York State Dept. of Health Sexual Violence Services,  Moving to End Sexual Assault
 
(c) Robyn King. All Rights Reserved.